This blog began as documentation of my journey into formal ministry. Now that I have received a call it will continue to function as a place for me to address concerns, celebrations and anything else that might catch my fancy. Please remember to "Be A Blessing To Someone Today"! God Bless, Roy
First off let me announce that on July 20th I will be doing Pulpit Supply for my friend Howard Blecha at the Humboldt Christian Church. I'm looking forward to getting to visit with his congregation again and have already started preparing the sermon. Howard told me yesterday that when he asked who the congregation wanted to fill in for him several said "get that Baptist guy again". I had to chuckle over that one, Howard said they couldn't remember my name but remember me as the "Baptist Guy". Oh well, I could certainly be remembered as worse. I'm planning on getting a proper video camera before we go down, so I can finally take a decent video of the sermon. Maddie ended up having an issue with her memory card on her phone and unfortunately that means my last sermon was lost.
This last week or so has been a bit hectic with work and dealing with things at home. Last Wednesday I went with Creath to Watertown, SD to look at a car. Creath's car got caught in a hailstorm up in Sioux Falls and the Insurance Company totaled it out, so he decided he wanted to use the money they gave him for the car to try and find his 'dream car'. Well ironically enough he found just what he was looking for on Craigslist. He located a young man in Watertown who was looking to sell a 1983 Chevrolet Z28 Camaro. So being the wonderful father I am (every so often anyways) I drove all the way to Sioux Falls to spend the night and to drive with him early in the morning to get to Watertown to see this car. Long story short, the car wasn't bad at all, so I negotiated with the seller a bit on the price and then we shook on the deal. Creath was thrilled to get to drive it back to Sioux Falls. It's a black car that has been recently repainted. The paint job isn't perfect, but it's not awful either. The car handles well and everything works on it, including the rear wipers.
Creath Karlen with his 1983 Camaro
WmRoy Karlen photo
On a less happy note, this week we finally had to have our beloved pet 'Gracie' put to sleep. It was a very difficult thing to do and we put it off for as long as we felt we could. Maddie is still very sad over the loss of her 'baby' but as a result all the other animals are being lavished with her attention. Aubrey and Pansie seem to understand that she is gone, I think they realized that she was sick and somehow understood that when I carried her out the door that last time that she wasn't coming back home. I buried her in the back by the oak tree next to Jasper and Holly. Maddie wants to get a headstone for her so we'll take care of that this next week. I have a friend that sells 'rocks' and one of his products is pet headstones.
Maddie Karlen with her baby girl "Gracie"
WmRoy Karlen photo
I'll likely post again before the 20th but for now I need to run. I pray that this brief blog post finds you all well and blessed along the path of your individual faith journey. Please remember that no matter what comes down the road to you today, either good or bad that your God loves and cares for you deeply. Don't forget to spend a bit of time in prayer and thanksgiving for all that the Lord has created for each of us. Many Blessings to all! Roy
This past Friday I traveled to Wakefield, NE along with other American Baptist Men from Churches in Omaha, Lincoln and Norfolk. We spent our time there helping to clean up debris from the Tornadoes on June 16th. The town of Wakefield itself was very lucky as the actual twisters very, very narrowly missed the town. But unfortunately, they did impact some residential areas outside of the village. Several farm homes were destroyed and a great number of farm buildings were heavily damaged or completely demolished. There was a great deal of shredded steel from granaries littered across the fields.
Tornado Damage near Wakefield, NE
On the farm where we were helping there were two large machine sheds that were ripped right up and entirely torn to bits. The tractors, combines and other equipment remained behind and amazingly enough suffered very little damage. All the buildings in that location were either completely destroyed or very heavily impacted save one building. That building happened by providence to be the location where five individuals took shelter. Even more remarkably, it was located adjacent to the two large machine sheds that were ripped down. All that remained of those two sheds was the bases of the poles that had supported the sides of the structures. The brick home on the property was leveled to the foundation and scattered, the man that lived there survived by taking refuge in the basement.
American Baptist Men helping clean up fields near Wakefield, NE
I am on the far left side of the photo with my back to the camera.
We were able to clear several fields for the Farmer that we were assigned to assist and he was very appreciative of all our efforts. Large sections of the fields we were in will have to be torn up and replanted as soon as possible. All the wreckage, wood, brick and steel will need to be removed first or else it will run the risk of damaging the equipment used in replanting. I am afraid though that some of the areas aren't going to dry out sufficiently in the time frame needed in order to replant.
Cleaning up after the Wakefield Tornadoes American Baptist Men of Nebraska
American Baptist Men helping clean up fields near Wakefield, NE
I am to the left of the tractor with my back to the camera.
I did ask and this farm was insured so they will not have a total loss from the storm, whether or not they are able to replant. Of course there is no way to be made completely well from such a disaster, the loss of man hours and the expense of cleaning up is just over whelming. Thankfully, these days most farmers opt to carry crop insurance.
Tornado damage near Wakefield, NE
Besides the American Baptist Men, there were also a number of other organizations with people in the Wakefield area assisting with the clean up and recovery. It is a wonderful thing to see the outpouring of assistance that these natural disasters bring to the forefront. I should also report that members of our congregation 'Sunset Hills Baptist' also sent members to Pilger on this past Thursday. At this time I do not know what type of work they were assigned to but Bob Slechta and I drove through Pilger on our way to Wakefield and it was obvious that cleanup there will be ongoing for quite sometime.
Video of twin tornadoes that hit near Wakefield, NE
As terrible as the effects of these storms are they provide us with the chance to demonstrate and to truly be 'the hands & feet of Christ'. It's in our responses to these misfortunes to our fellow man that we best model to others the love, grace and care of our God the Father. Praise to God, that so very many have and do respond at these times of need.
Tornado damage near Wakefield, NE
Tornado damage near Wakefield, NE
On another note, this afternoon I started reading a new book. It's another book by Bart Ehrman entitled "Peter, Paul & Mary Magdalene". It's an in depth look into just what we do and don't know about these figures in Christianity. Ehrman is the chair of the Department of Religious Studies at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. Ehrman is widely considered a leading authority on Early Christianity, Jesus and the New Testament. He is however, a controversial figure in that he is currently a professing 'Agnostic'. I will point out though that he has received his seminary training, ordination and has served in an American Baptist Church as a minister. Ehrman is one of my favorite authors due to the depth of his knowledge and his engaging writing style.
Well it's getting late and I need to get going. May this blog post find you all well and blessed by our Lord.
Update: June 30th, there is currently a tornado in Wayne County, NE. Please pray for those in the affected areas. Another day of rough weather in Nebraska.
I just wanted to post a brief update today as it's been a spell since I put up a blog post. By now everyone has heard about the tornado damage here in Nebraska as well as the damage up in South Dakota in and around Wessington Springs. Well Monday night here in Omaha several local Pizza Shops did a fundraiser for the tornado victims in and around Pilger. So Gail and I pushed our workout night to Tuesday in order to go to 'Old Chicago' to be a part of the fundraising effort. I hear that all told the various restaurants raised over $72,000 that night. I can believe it as our waiter told us that his restaurant had raised over $10,000 so far that evening. We did go pretty late in order to miss most of the crowd, so I suspect they were about done for the night. Friday I will be taking the day off of work in order to go with the Baptist Church from Norfolk to Wakefield, NE. Wakefield suffered significant damage along with Pilger, but unfortunately since Pilger has gotten most of the press Wakefield has had fewer groups coming in to help out. I'm looking forward to lend whatever help I can that day and hopefully it will make a difference to at least one or more of the good citizens of Wakefield. Please continue to pray for those affected by the storms as it will be a long, long process for many of them to get back to any resemblance of normality. I don't have much time to blog right now as we're busy here at the shop this week but I did want to report on my mother and mother-in-law (Mary). Mother had a mild heart attack as I reported in my last blog post but she's bounced back and she's as fit as a fiddle once more. There was no blockage that required treatment so they gave her some medication for clotting and she's good to go. This past Sunday my mother-in-law suffered a fall in which she broke her right wrist and broke some bones in her cheek. She has some disability on her left side from previous strokes and not having the use of her right hand is a real problem as her left hand isn't much use to her. Mary has been in the hospital but will be going to a Nursing Home today. She'll have to be at the Nursing Home until she is able to regain some function in her right hand. All prayers for her healing would be much appreciated. Mary is a couple of months younger than my Mother but having suffered from strokes she is in much poorer health. I'll come back and blog again after going to Wakefield on Friday. May you all have a wonderful and richly blessed week. In His Abiding Love & Grace, Roy
Here's a video link from Pilger showing an entire house being picked up and tossed to the side. Incredible!
Well, today certainly was a productive day at the Karlen household. This morning Gail and Maddie were not feeling well, so I went to Benson Baptist by myself for their 8:30 am service. I was running late and on top of that when I came to the Maple Street exit I discovered that Maple Street heading east was closed for repairs. Now let me admit that for a second I thought about hopping the curb and driving through the vacant lot that was there and around the section of street that was torn out, these are the kind of thoughts that one has when one drives a large SUV. But, my better sense came to my rescue and I instead detoured west to 108th Street and jumped onto Blondo Street, and from there continued my eastward journey. All in all I was only a few minutes late and I wasn't the only one sneaking into the back rows at that time anyway, so it all worked out just fine in spite of the detour.
After Church I came home and started working in the yard. It was only by good fortune that I chose to do the yard work early in the day as this afternoon a pretty good storm rolled through with winds gusting to 70 mph. It seems we've gotten into one of those routines where we have bad weather every Sunday afternoon.
While Maddie and I were outside working on the yard, she discovered three baby blackbirds that had fallen out of their nest. One was dead, one looks to be injured and one seems no worse for the wear of falling out of the apple tree which they were laying underneath. Look as I might I was unable to detect any trace of a nest in the tree. But, that tree has very dense foliage and has branches going every which way, so it was no real surprise that a nest could be completely hidden.
I picked the two live birds up for Maddie and put them in a shoebox for her. Once I'd finished the yard work I then ran to Petco and got a box of small mealworms which Maddie has spent much of the afternoon and evening feeding to the remaining two baby birds. Realistically, I don't think the one that is injured will make it through the night, but the other is very lively and just might have a chance if Maddie is able to keep it fed and watered.
After finishing the yard, I gave Gracie our elderly Cocker Spaniel another bath. She's become somewhat incontinent in her old age and we have to crate her at times and limit where she sleeps now. I really have to stop and reflect on sweet Gracie. Gracie is just the happiest little old lady you could ever hope to find. Even though she has a long list of infirmities related to her advanced years, she is just completely content and never lets her limitations get her down. Her face is entirely white with age, but her eyes are bright and when she sees you her tiny stump of a tail goes a hundred miles an hour. She seems to love life in spite of all the maladies that plague her in her old age. Quite honestly, I think if she were any other dog we'd have had her put down by now. Certainly she has enough issues that we could justify it in our own minds, but gosh darn it all, she is just so happy and doesn't seem to be suffering nor in pain.
There is certainly a lesson to be learned from sweet petite Gracie, attitude is extremely important in how we approach any and all limitations in life. A sad reality of all of ours is that as we age, we will encounter more and more limitations and infirmities. But, we can choose to not allow those things to define us nor to limit our enjoyment of our lives, and those around us. Gracie just adores our daughter Maddie and she is thrilled that she is now back home and at times it seems for her just being around Maddie makes everything else worthwhile. Look to the good in your life, look to that thing that brings you joy, that thing you love, that thing that makes all the troubles that life can bring seem small and insignificant. Now hopefully for most of us there is a long list of things that we can look to. I prayerfully hope that for each of you reading this post that your love of God and the ability to enjoy His creation is near the top (if not the top) of your list.
Often the 'Motivational Gurus' tell us to write down our goals and aspirations, like them, I encourage you (I know that I will today) to write down all those things in your life that make it all worthwhile. The mere act of writing it down will strengthen you when you find that life is getting you down. Just remember little Gracie, if anyone has a reason to be tired and ready to give up on life it must be her. Yet sweet precious Gracie just keeps on going and keeps on loving all of her family in spite of her failing health. She's an inspiration as well as a remarkable little dog.
While writing today I've been listening to this group that I stumbled upon quite by accident. I really enjoy their music and I'm going to have to Google them and learn more about them. Take a listen, I think you'll enjoy it.
Earlier today, I learned that my mother had a small heart attack during the night. She's doing fine today, but last night my youngest brother drove her to the hospital in Chamberlain, SD. They are hoping to release her in the morning, though she will likely be going to see a specialist in Sioux Falls as soon as possible. I would very much appreciate any and all prayers for healing for her. She's been in remarkably good health for an 87 year old woman up until this incident. To be honest though, I'm not too worried about her. She's always enjoyed robust health and I know she'll bounce back quickly. Her father had a heart attack in his sixties and then lived to be ninety-seven without another incident with his heart.
May this day find you all well and filled with the spirit of love and the unfailing grace of our Heavenly Father.
In His Care,
Roy
6/2/14 Update: I have not heard yet if Mother has gone home but, I am happy to report that both baby birds survived the night and seem to be much stronger today. I am frankly shocked, but Maddie tells me she woke up in the middle of the night and fed them again, so perhaps they'll actually make it through. 6/2/14 Additional Update: My sister Julie tells me that they are taking my Mother to Sioux Falls today for more testing. My cousin Jeff is a Doctor in Sioux Falls and he apparently has gotten somethings lined up for her. 6/3/14 Update: My Mother had an angiogram but everything looked fine. They are just going to put her on medication no stints were needed. Sad to report both of the baby birds died yesterday. Wild babies just don't do well without their mothers.
Three years ago today a friend of mine from my college days passed away. My old friend Mark Winquist lost his battle to cancer after a courageous fight. I will always remember coming into work the day after Memorial Day and pulling up my e-mail account and seeing the title to an e-mail from my friend John Forman which simply read 'Mark'. For whatever reason as soon as I saw that name I knew in my heart my friend from so long ago had died. This was truly amazing for you see I didn't even know he was ill, unfortunately we had fallen out of contact with one another. I had talked to him on the phone briefly about a year and a half before he died but prior to that it had been nearly twenty years since we'd visited. Mark had been incredibly active in the Methodist Church in Brookings, SD and had been among other things their Youth Leader. It is a testament to his service for his congregation that they built a 'Prayer Garden' in his honor.
Mark's passing hit me very hard at the time, and I suppose it still does. I hate the idea that I've reached the age when my friends are now dying from disease and decay. But the thing that really hit hard and hurt so much was the realization that I had lost contact with Mark and so many other people that had once meant so very, very much to me. I also realized that if it hadn't been for me remaining a little bit in contact with our mutual friend John I'd have likely not known for years if ever what had happened to Mark.
Many of my memories of Mark have to do with lifting weights. My good friend John Forman, Mark and I used to compete in Powerlifting Meets. Rather I should say that in our respective weight classes I was getting pummeled, John was in the hunt, and Mark was dominating. Without a doubt Mark was the strongest man pound for pound that I will ever know personally. When it came to physical strength he was the perfect storm of genetic potential, muscle attachments, determination, training and intelligence. I remember well screaming encouragement as Mark hoisted weights that no sane man would crawl under, not to mention a man of Mark's size.
Mark Winquist receiving a trophy from Skip Parks
Sad to say both of these great lifters have passed away.
WmRoy Karlen photo
John Forman receiving a trophy from Skip Parks
WmRoy Karlen photo
Roy Karlen (me) receiving a trophy from Skip Parks.
John Forman is in the background.
WmRoy Karlen photo
Mark's death spurred me to reach out and reconnect with some friends who I hadn't talked to for many years. It also forced me to, or perhaps more accurately gave me the opportunity to apologize to some whom I had injured in the past. Thankfully, most forgave me and at least partially several broken fences were mended, or at least acknowledged. I did travel back to South Dakota to attend the funeral and I tell you it was a great service. At the one year anniversary of Mark's death I dedicated a sermon in his honor. The video of that sermon can be found at this blog post. Blog Post with Sermon dedicated to Mark's memory The process of reaching out to my old friends and loved ones, and realizing their grace towards me, ultimately gave me a theological revelation. These experiences revealed to me how much, much greater our God and His love is than I had ever imagined. It is a never ending source of amazement that God can use even the worst situations in our lives for our and His ultimate good. Now please do NOT think that I am saying God causes bad things to happen to anyone. I find that line of theological thinking to be extremely dangerous and damning for God. Rather than bog down this blog post I'll put that in the back of my mind for a post for another day. Just realize that your God loves you deeply and only wants the very best for you. Now don't think for a second that I'm saying Mark was an absolute saint. To say that Mark was eccentric may well be ranked as one of the greatest understatements I have ever made. And the fact that he and I had become estranged wasn't entirely my fault, as I did try to contact him a couple of times during the twenty years or so that we hadn't communicated and the last time we talked, it was I that tracked down his phone number and gave him a call. I don't think Mark ever forgave me for divorcing Carolin, my first wife. He was very fond of her, and I'm certain that he was a bit more than a little jealous when he found out that I had asked her to marry me. But envious or not, he was one of our groomsmen (along with my friend John).
Today as I remember Mark, I'm reminded as well that I need to contact some of those friends once again and see how the last three years have progressed for their lives. I'd love to get some of them together and meet someday but who knows if that will ever come to pass. I guess I better resolve myself to try and put this together. Don't let those you love go by without knowing that they are in fact important to you, let them know today.
May this post find you all reminded of the many great people you have been fortunate enough to share your lives with. God's abundant and never ending blessings and love to you all. In His Glory, Roy
PS: I am also sad to report that Mark's mother passed away earlier this year. His father is still alive and I pray for him to be comforted after the loss of his lifelong mate. God's blessings to him.
This past Saturday (May 17th) my nephew Bryant was married to his fiancee Emily. The wedding was at Saint Elizabeth Ann Seton Catholic Church at 118th and Fort Street here in Omaha. I had never been inside of this Church before even though I used to live just a few blocks from it at one time. It's a very nice building and it served as a wonderful setting for a wedding. Bryant and his new wife looked to be a very happy couple and I pray that they have had adequate pre-marital counseling to help them forge their way towards a very happy, rewarding and lifelong marriage.
I really enjoyed the Priest's Homily during the service as he very ardently stressed the indisputable fact that a marriage is a covenant with God, and not something to be taken lightly in any way shape or form. These are sentiments that I've shared on this blog before and ones that I desperately wish were beaten into the hearts and minds of each and everyone who goes before the Lord in a house of worship to recite vows of matrimony. Past blogging on Marriage
The Priest also stressed the importance of children in a marriage. While we may wish to simply attribute that to it being a Catholic wedding, it is something that is absolutely important for all of us Christians to consider. Certainly one of if not the primary function of a marriage is to bring new life into this world. Furthermore we need to raise that new life in such a fashion as to instill a love and devotion to God; this is the most important thing we can do for our children in trying to set them up for a successful marriage of their own. Without a steadfast belief and realization that marriage is a covenant with God the Father, as well as our spouse we will always take our vows far, far too lightly. It is no small thing when we go before God and pledge to Him that we desire to be joined together in His eyes as no longer two people but one. It has been realized for many years that divorce is a serious problem for not only society at large but for Christians in particular. Now there are studies that contradict each other as far as to the rate of divorce among Christians as a whole, as well as among the various sub-categories of Christians, and I really am at a loss to say which study may or may not be more accurate. But honestly, who among us needs an actual study to realize the scope of this problem in society. Which of us does not know of several Christian friends who have divorced. Which of us does not know of a minister of the Faith who has divorced, for crying out loud I know of ministers who have had affairs (within their congregations to boot) while in the pulpit, gotten divorced, remarried and are still in the ministry. Can we honestly say that this is not a serious problem for us as believers. Scripture tells us that Jesus himself held no place for the concept of divorce.
Mark 10:2-12
New International Version (NIV)
2 Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” 3 “What did Moses command you?” he replied. 4 They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” 5 “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied.6 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh.9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” 10 When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this.11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”
Luke 16:18
New International Version (NIV)
18 “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
Matthew 5
New International Version (NIV)
31 “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
Matthew 19
New International Version (NIV)
1When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan.2 Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’[b]?6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
7 “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
It is important to note that in Mark, Jesus does not provide any exceptions for divorce. We see this repeated in Luke and then in Matthew we see divorce mentioned twice and both times the exception of sexual infidelity on the part of the wife (and the wife alone) is given as the only legitimate reason for divorce. Now how can that be, why would Mark and Luke give no exceptions but Matthew clearly provide one. Well in my opinion the answer to that is fairly clear and straightforward. Let me elaborate upon that a bit. Nearly all Biblical Scholars are in agreement that Mark was the first Gospel to be written (though almost certainly all of the genuine letters of Paul were written prior to any of the Gospels) and that the authors of both Matthew and Luke had copies of the Gospel of Mark along with what has come to be known as the 'Q Source' which was an early collection of Jesus' sayings and teachings. No copy of this 'Q Source' has ever been found it's existence has rather been inferred from the writings of Matthew and Luke. So why would Mark clearly provide no exceptions for divorce, then Luke follow suite, but Matthew decide to interject a way 'out' so to speak into his Gospel. Much 'theological hay' has been made over this, but in my opinion the answer is clear and easily determined. Mark is the earliest and also generally considered the most reliable of the three synoptics and the one generally defaulted to in times of disagreement. Luke followed Mark's lead but Matthew, who it is extremely important to realize is writing to a predominately Jewish audience, included a very specific exception. Matthew has allowed for a divorce in the circumstance that the wife has been unfaithful (and again please note there is no exception for an unfaithful husband). But why add this exception, well Judaism is a very patriarchal culture and within traditional Judaism ancestry is of considerable importance. One need only to look at the various genealogies in scripture to see the importance of this factor in Hebrew culture. If a woman has an affair and proven herself to be an unfaithful spouse, the husband can no longer be certain that any child born is in fact his own (there were no paternity tests in those days). This would disrupt his family legacy and could result in having the child of another man inherit his property. These are not things which would go over well in a patriarchal society. As a side note it should be noted that this emphasis on patriarchy is a factor in the prohibition on homosexuality... but that's a whole other blogging subject that will have to wait for another day.
It seems fairly obvious that the author of Matthew added to or revised the teachings of Jesus as reflected in both Mark and Luke. This exception was added to placate the group that this Gospel was originally addressed to, a group of Jewish Christians who almost certainly did not differentiate themselves from Judaism as a whole. Rather this group would have viewed themselves as just another of several dozen different sects of Judaism that existed in the first century AD. I've attached a link for those that might wish to learn more about the people and culture to which this Gospel was addressed. Link to information on the Gospel of Matthew
For the author of Matthew to have completely banned all divorce after Jesus' lead would have likely been too difficult for this rigidly patriarchal society to have accepted. Of course nearly always all of these passages are brushed away with the pass of a hand, saying something like, "in those days if a man divorced a woman she would be destitute, she would have to resort to prostitution just to survive." Well, let's hold on just for a moment. If Jesus was merely putting this strict of a position against divorce as a protection against women being left in poverty, than why didn't he merely require them to be provided for by the divorcing spouse. And let's look further into these passages of scripture because there's something here that everyone loves to look beyond (or is it we just want to avoid it).
Perhaps the most troubling portion of all these pieces of scripture is all the commentary on adultery. All of these passages point to the man as committing adultery if he divorces his wife and remarries, but in Matthew and Luke the man who marries a divorced woman is also guilty of adultery, and than in Mark even the wife commits adultery if she divorces her husband and marries another man.
If Jesus' primary concern with admonishing divorce had to do with the financial welfare of the woman than something here does not add up. For why would it be a sin (adultery) for the woman to divorce her husband and remarry another man, isn't she thereby merely shifting who is paying the bills so to speak. And for crying out loud, why would it be a sin for another man to marry a divorced woman, shouldn't he be lauded as doing charity rather than condemned of a sin. It seems painfully obvious to me that the old argument of concern for the welfare of the woman doesn't hold up to scrutiny. Of course I'm certain that Jesus cared deeply for the welfare of all, but I don't believe that's the underlying theme here. What happens in a divorce... well, we of course break a sacred vow, a covenant made not only with our spouse but with our God. This 'brokenness', this betrayal of faith puts us out of relationship not only with our spouse but with God, this is the sin that is involved. Above all else, God is a God of reconciliation. God is in the business of love, grace, forgiveness and salvation but honestly in my opinion all of these are just stones along the path to reconciliation. God wants you, God wants me, God wants all humanity and all his creation to have a deep and profound relationship with Him. The problem with divorce as I stated before is the brokenness, we are out of relationship. The problem with remarriage outside of the original marriage is also one of brokenness, for these remarriages prevent the reconciliation of the original covenant... the original marriage contract. The husband that remarries blocks that reconciliation, the wife that remarries blocks that reconciliation, and (what seems so extremely unfair at first glance) the new spouse is in a state of sin because their marriage to the divorced person blocks that reconciliation as well.
So very many of us, myself included most of all, would love to see these passages of scripture suddenly disappear from the canon. These are hard verses, and again so many of us just wish they were not there... but as I so like to say: "If when reading scripture you never feel convicted, if you never see the hairy hand of God pointing a fat finger right back at you... well then you're not paying close enough attention." But, there is power in these passages and we need to understand the gravity of the desire and drive that our God has to be reconciled onto us. There can be little doubt that Jesus viewed divorce and remarriage as a sin, but what about all of us who have been divorced and who have been remarried within the Church. Whereas I find myself in agreement with my conservative brothers and sisters on my stance on divorce being a sin, I part company with them in thinking that I can lay down any kind of pronouncement and/or judgment concerning it. Long, long ago the church decided to look the other way concerning these passages and perhaps that's no small part of why we find ourselves encountering divorce so regularly today. What are we to do about the messes we've made... in this world we divorce, we remarry and far too many divorce and remarry again or even again. We are so very broken in the department of marriage that it simply has to be a considerable burden on the heart of our Lord. God wants us to be reconciled, but for most of us this just simply seems impossible. The good news is of course that we worship a God of love and grace, in Him and through Him there is nothing beyond repair. Though many of us will simply have to wait for complete reconciliation until beyond the grave we are still able to turn to God, confess that we know we have strayed and broken His heart (not to mention all the human hearts we've trampled upon) as well as our sacred covenant with Him, and we will find that we are already forgiven. Now let us not say that "well okay since God is all graceful we can sin all we wish so who cares about divorce". Paul addressed this in the letter to the church in Rome, since we are in Christ we are to be dead to sin. Sin should no longer be within us, but of course we all know that Paul also said in Romans "For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do - this I keep on doing" We will never eliminate divorce entirely from our society, in fact we'll never completely eliminate it from within the church or even amongst the clergy. But we simply must do all we can do to eliminate it from our own marriages, our own families, our own churches. We must do as much as we can possibly do in our human capacity. We need to encourage those that we know are getting married to engage in pre-marital counseling, we need to encourage those that we know are struggling in their marriages to go and receive counseling either from a minister or a professional counselor. We need to love each other enough to forgive and move forward and not simply give up and move on.
Thus far I have addressed marriage and divorce strictly from a theological point, but are there any pragmatic reasons for divorce. Generally the two areas which are universally accepted as means for a divorce are physical and emotional abuse. In the case of physical violence and physical abuse I certainly believe that our Lord would sanction removing oneself from such a situation. The subject of emotional abuse is a bit more difficult to qualify. It would seem to me that emotional abuse is a bit like the famous quote from a member of Congress who supposedly said something along these lines concerning pornography, "I can't tell you exactly what it is, but I sure enough know it when I see it." I think in almost all marriages there is from time to time something done or said that would qualify as emotional abuse. Certainly in my first marriage I was guilty of what could only be classified as emotional abuse. But did it rise to the level which would justify divorce... no, I don't think it did. I believe in my own circumstance as well as a great many others what was needed was an honest and sincere commitment to counseling and trying to salvage the marriage. The problem is that through ego and anger we tend to let the relationship turn so poisonous that neither an honest nor a sincere commitment can be made to counseling. Far too often (perhaps always) we divorce over things that should have been addressed in pre-martial counseling. Money, family, sex, children, where we want to live, what status we hope to have in our community, and others. So often failed marriages point to infidelity as the reason for the divorce but generally in my opinion that is just a symptom of the real issue. I will confess a concern for Bryant and Emily as they are burdened with having had both sets of parents divorce during their childhoods. One can only pray that the Pastor chose not only to stress the covenant with God during the Homily but also during the pre-marital counseling as well. I will continue to pray for Bryant and his new bride, along with praying for his younger brother Tyler who was married earlier this year up in South Dakota. Please note that any interpretation of scripture is the result of my own study, research, reflection and meditation, and does not reflect the position of my denomination either locally or nationally. Furthermore my thoughts concerning marriage, divorce, and remarriage are also my own. These positions are the result of my own life experiences, personal studies and observations. So please do not become agitated over any commentary of mine, these are my thoughts and opinions and as they say "your mileage may vary". God's grace, peace, blessings and love to you all in abundance. In Christ, Roy
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