Funeral Manuscript for Phyllis Higgins, May 18, 2017

Order of Service – 
Funeral for Phyllis Higgins 

Welcome:
A loved one is a treasure of the heart and losing a loved one is like losing a piece of yourself, but the love that Phyllis brought each of you did not leave, for the essence of her soul still lingers.  It cannot escape your hearts, for it has been there forever. Cling to the memories and let them find their way to heal you. The love and laughter, the joy in the togetherness you shared, will make you strong. You will come to realize that your time together, no matter how long, was meant to be and you were blessed to have the precious gift of her love in your lives. Keep your hearts beating with the loving memories and trust in your faith to guide you through. Know that though life moves on... the beauty of love stays behind to embrace you. Your loved one... Phyllis has left you that love... her love, to hold in your hearts forever. 

Today, we have come together within the strengthening fellowship of friends and family:
to praise God for the life of Phyllis Higgins;
to share our grief with God and with one another;
to reaffirm our faith in God's unfailing goodness;
to hear again God's promise of resurrection;
and to commend Phyllis to God's everlasting care.

Music: Amazing Grace, Judds

Opening Prayer:
Gracious God, your love endures forever.  Your faithfulness is unfailing and all your promises are true.  The movement of your Spirit is evident even in our darkest moments.  Attend to us now in our grief as we trust you will.  Speak words of comfort to our hearts.  Open us up to receive your hope. O God of grace and glory, we remember before you this day our sister Phyllis. We thank you for giving her to us, her family and friends, to know and to love as a companion on our earthly pilgrimage. In your boundless compassion, console us who mourn. Give us faith to see death as the gate of eternal life, so that in quiet confidence we may continue our course on earth until by your call, we are reunited with those who have gone before; through Jesus Christ our Lord.  Amen.

Let us hear now a reading from the Old Testament:  
Psalm 23  King James Version (KJV)
23 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Let us hear now a reading from the New Testament:
1 Corinthians 13:1-13  New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)
13 If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. 9 For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; 10 but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. 12 For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. 13 And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.

Pastoral Prayer:
Let us please pray: God our Father, Your power brings us to birth, Your providence guides our lives, and by Your command, we return to dust.  Lord, those who die still live in Your presence, their lives change but do not end. I pray in hope for this family, relatives, and friends, and for all the dead known to You alone.  In company with Christ, Who died and Who now lives, may they rejoice in Your kingdom, where all our tears are wiped away. Unite us together again in one family, to sing Your praise forever and ever.  Amen.

Music:  Jealous of the Angels – Donna Taggart     

Message:  Pastor Roy Karlen – Woodlawn Christian Church

Phyllis Marie Higgins, daughter of Lawrence and Leona Magner, was born January 14, 1944, in Lake City, Iowa. She attended a one-room country school near Lake City before attending and graduating from Lake City High School in 1962.

On January 4, 1963, Phyllis was united in marriage to Raymond Higgins at Woodlawn Christian Church here in Lake City.  Phyllis passed away Saturday, May 13, 2017, at her home in Ruthven, Iowa at the age of 73. She was preceded in death by her parents.

She is survived by her husband, Raymond Higgins; her son, Nathan Higgins and his wife, Maggie; two grandchildren, Dakota Johnson and her husband Jason, and Nickolas Higgins; by three great-grandchildren, Macy Higgins, Zoey Higgins, and Haley Johnson; two brothers, Raymond Magner and Robert Magner along with Robert's wife, Tammy; a sister, Elaine Allen and Steve Northrup. 

On Monday, Keith Lampe and I journeyed to Ruthven, Iowa to meet with Phyllis' family and discuss the arrangements for her funeral here in Lake City.  One of the more peculiar roles that a Minister finds oneself in, is discussing the life of an individual that they have never met to those who knew that individual the most intimately.  Each of you knew Phyllis and each of you has stories and memories to share and to cherish.  I encourage you all to share them today either publicly here at this service, or together privately when we adjourn to Woodlawn for the luncheon.

While Keith and I were in Ruthven, the family told us how much Phyllis loved her garden and flowers.  She had birdhouses and feeders for the birds which she enjoyed watching.  Phyllis loved doing yard work and keeping her yard looking beautiful, she took great pride in her yard.

She was an avid collector of Franciscan Pottery, and from what I saw at the home it looked like she focused mainly on the Coronado pattern, collecting several different colors of this lovely pattern.  Often the family would give her gifts of this favored type of pottery.

Phyllis liked to keep a clean and orderly home.  Cody told us how she was a workaholic and always found something to keep herself busy.  She also told us that her grandmother was always careful to wear a coordinated outfit and how she always kept herself nice looking at all times. She enjoyed sewing and was a talented seamstress completing numerous quilts and other sewing projects.

Phyllis enjoyed spending time with her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  It would seem that she agreed with the author of Proverbs: 
Proverbs 17:6 Grandchildren are the crown of the aged.
Truly, as Phyllis and the author of Proverbs 17 knew, grandchildren, as well as great-grandchildren, are one of the greatest joys in any lifetime.

Ray and the family talked about how Phyllis loved to go to garage sales and flea markets, and I'm sure she was always on the look out for her beloved Coronado pattern.  Phyllis enjoyed being with her family, for her family was whom she wanted to visit and to be with and she did enjoy their company greatly.

Both Cody and Nathan confessed to being a handful for Phyllis.  Cody spent a great deal of time with her grandparents and you could tell in the conversation that theirs was a special bond.  She told stories about hiding from her grandmother on top of the refrigerator and even hiding on top of the roof of the house.  From both locations, she would watch her grandmother going around looking for her.  There was also a story about lighting a candle and putting it on a shelf where it subsequently lit the wall on fire, the slightly mismatched paint on the wall leaves a trace to spark the retelling of the story to this day.  Not to be outdone on marks to spark stories, Nathan left a mark on the ceiling with a bullwhip that Ray pointed out to us as well.  Apparently, he got an earful from his mother over that incident.  Though Phyllis would threaten, the family told us that she wasn't the one in the family to mete out discipline.

Nathan told about how his mother would drop him off in the morning by the lake to go fishing or hunting, and how he'd spend the day hunting and fishing until she came back in the afternoon to pick him up.  Sadly, this kind of freedom while growing up is becoming a thing of the past even in our small towns and communities.  He told about being dropped off to hunt and then walking home, walking through town carrying his shotgun and how this wasn't looked upon as anything peculiar at that time.  You certainly couldn't do that today without being questioned.

Phyllis enjoyed doing genealogy, she tracked down the families ancestry and left behind a great deal of information for her family to cherish.  Ray told us how she knew where every family member was buried and how Phyllis would go around placing flowers on the graves each Memorial Day.  Later today we'll commit her earthly remains to the ground in the “North Raccoon River Cemetery” near Lanesboro where she will be surrounded by many generations of Ray's family.  

Phyllis was a loving great-grandmother, grandmother, mother, and wife.  A wonderful woman and a treasure to her family.  Let us hear again the words of the Author of Proverbs:
Proverbs 31:10-30
Ode to a Capable Wife
10 A capable wife who can find?
    She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
    and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,
    all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
    and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant,
    she brings her food from far away.
15 She rises while it is still night
    and provides food for her household
    and tasks for her servant-girls.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
    with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength,
    and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
    Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,
    and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor,
    and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid for her household when it snows,
    for all her household are clothed in crimson.
22 She makes herself coverings;
    her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the city gates,
    taking his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;
    she supplies the merchant with sashes.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
    and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
    and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household,
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her happy;
    her husband too, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,
    but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

When you lose someone you love, your life becomes strange, the ground beneath you becomes fragile.  Your heart has grown heavy with loss; and though this loss has wounded others too... no one knows what has been taken from you when the silence of absence deepens.
Flickers of guilt kindle regret for all that was left unsaid or undone.  There will be days when you wake up happy once again and inside feel the fullness of life... until that moment breaks and you will be thrown back into the black waves of loss.  Days when you will have your heart back, and you are able to function well... when suddenly with no warning, you become ambushed by grief.  It becomes hard to trust yourself, and all you can depend on is that sorrow will remain faithful to itself.  More than you, it knows its way and will find the right time to pull back the curtain of grief.  And when the work of grief is done, the wound of loss will heal and you will have learned to wean your mind from that gap in your heart and be able to enter that deep place in your soul where your loved one has awaited your return all along.

Though all of you gathered today, miss Phyllis, you should all rest assured that this is only a temporary parting and that you'll each get to see Phyllis' smile once again when you are reunited in Heaven.  Praise be to God.  Today Phyllis is reunited with all of her friends and family that have gone on before her, and today she is in the very presence of our almighty and all-loving God... Praise be to God indeed...

Eulogies and Memories:
If any of the family or friends would like to share a memory or story, please either come forward at this time or stand and speak from where you are seated.

Music: Heaven Was Needing a Hero - 

Closing Prayer:
The family invites you all to join them in further celebration of  Phyllis' life and a time of shared remembrances and closure, by joining with them for a luncheon in the Church's fellowship hall immediately following this service.  After the lunch, you are all welcome to go with the family to the cemetery near Lanesboro for the committal service.

Let us pray:
O God, our Strength and our Redeemer, Giver of life, and Conqueror of death, we open our hearts to you just as we are.  We celebrate your gift of life freely given but are grieved by a sense of loss in the face of death.  The love which binds us to one another leaves us aching as ties are broken.  Accept our tears as emblems of devotion, and transform them into waters of life to nourish us in the days ahead.

We trust you.  We love you.  We know in Christ that your love is everlasting.  Nothing can separate any of us from your abiding care.  With you is eternal life. With confidence, we now entrust Phyllis to your unfailing love and overflowing goodness.  Through the power that raised Christ from the dead to live eternally with you, lift up this, your servant, to life fulfilled beyond our imagining.  We give you but your own, enfold her in your everlasting arms, hold her for she is your child.

Now strengthen us, through the gift of your Spirit, to face into the future with confidence that you stand with us.  Grant that the changes of life may leave us stronger as we journey through life.
Reassured of your abiding presence, help us to knit more firmly the ties that bind us one to another.  Renewed by your love, help us to love in ever larger circles so as to embrace your people everywhere till at last we are all united eternally through Christ, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever.  Amen.

Benediction:

Music:

Committal Service
Selfishly, we as mortals wish to hold on to Phyllis. It brings great pain to let her go. Living in the resurrection hope of our Lord Jesus Christ, in the trust of a loving God and in the promise of eternal life, we now commit her body to its place of rest. We will continue to mourn Phyllis, but now her laughter will warm the kingdom of God. We will continue to love Phyllis, but God will now take care of her. We will continue to carry Phyllis in our thoughts, but she will now be kept safe in God's hands. Receive her in the arms of your mercy, O God, into the blessed rest of everlasting peace, and into the glorious company of all your saints.

1 Corinthians 15:50-57  New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)
50 What I am saying, brothers and sisters,[a] is this: flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. 51 Listen, I will tell you a mystery! We will not all die,[b] but we will all be changed, 52 in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. 53 For this perishable body must put on imperishability, and this mortal body must put on immortality. 54 When this perishable body puts on imperishability, and this mortal body puts on immortality, then the saying that is written will be fulfilled:
“Death has been swallowed up in victory.”
55 “Where, O death, is your victory?
    Where, O death, is your sting?”
56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Believing in the Resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ, we now entrust Phyllis to the care of our Almighty God and we ask our Father to open the doors to his mansion and lead Phyllis to the room made ready just for her. As we now commit her body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, we commend her spirit to its new home. Rest eternal grant her; and let light perpetual shine upon her.

God has blessed and enriched our lives in giving us Phyllis to know and love here on this earth. Though our time together was not nearly enough, in committing her body to the earth, we give over to God the care of her spirit, and we acknowledge that we will one day reunite with her in God's Kingdom. The Lord bless her and keep her; the Lord make his face shine upon her and be gracious to her; the Lord look upon her with favor and give her peace.

This concludes our graveside service.

May the Lord bless you and keep you, may His strong arms encircle you and uphold you in your hour of grief.  God's peace and strength to you all.
Amen